Evidence

Lately, I've been getting the sinking sensation that Dorkfish is trying to 'off' me. It's nothing big, like changing a life insurance policy or anything, but it's the subtle things that I am finally noticing. Small, incidental things such as leaving the glass shower door open, so when I get up in the middle of night to pee, I run into it. 'Misplacing' my wine bottle opener so I am forced to use a knife and screwdriver, which is no simple task when one has a tremor. Suggesting we trade in my Volvo (the safest car on the road) for something less expensive. I think the cleaning ladies may be in on it as well as they somehow accidentally put furniture cleaner on my floors...

But today's conversation with Deuce finally gives me concrete evidence and I am sharing it with ALL OF YOU for my safety.

Setting: In the car, driving Deuce to preschool. I take a sip of my coffee when he says...

"Momma. Did you know that if you get married and your wife dies, you can get married again?"

Me: *cough, choke, cough* "Um, no. I hadn't been told that. Where did YOU hear that?!"

Deuce: "Daddy told me."

So now you ALL KNOW that if I 'disappear' you have concrete evidence from a four year old...

And if he gets remarried, none of you better laugh at her jokes.